All creation cries to you

A million apologies for the long hiatus! Evidently, studying and the internet for me just doesn't work. One exam down with the major one coming in 5 weeks and counting!

Today was a rather eventful day. Was woken up by a weird dream involving Mira, new SRC rooms, gyming and high staircases :/ Finally caught a movie with the coolkid and me thinks she's gonna want to not watch movies with me anymore :(

The one true thing I've been struggling a lot about is with trust. and love. Trust and love. I've been finding myself at a lost. Wondering whether I love him because I've been brought up in that environment, wondering whether its an 'all in my head' thing and basically wondering whether its real. whether this love, this faith, is real...

However, again and again, I find myself reminded of how real he is. of how he cares. that even as king, he wants a relationship, he longs to hear our voice. he still wants to our time. 

God's got perfect timing, really. Just when I was going through this tiny argument in my head, Daniel, in cf meeting shares about love. about joy. the simple things really. about joy and serving. To serve with your whole heart, to serve with joy. with love. no complains, to arguments. To serve a living King. :')

You see, its because he first loved us. That he died for my sins. That he IS the Alpha and Omega. I find myself forgetting that time after time. I find myself in a pit when trouble strikes but as Friedrich Nietzsche (a German philosopher with a cool name and even cooler moustache!! check it out here. mwhahaha) put it - "He who has a 'why' to live, can bear with almost any 'how'."

I've got my 'why' to live. so there.

Its time to continue the race, bearing every 'how' and 'what' and 'argh'!

Its a journey. Not an easy one, but its a journey I want to take.

One step at a time. learning, falling, getting up, walking. with him by my side, with him doing the steering. There's much to learn... to discover. 

I want that desperation.