Ker'na semua yang baik dalam hidupku itulah karyamu

Mengabdikan hidupku sesuai rencanaMu.

To give my upmost for his highest is to turn down so much of how I think, of how I feel. If things were my way, I imagine it would not be such a great world. I'm still too selfish that way. I'm trying to step through that door. You know, the door with life involving both pitfalls and blessings with a whole lot of surrender on the other side.

The amazing thing is that He never pushes. He'll bring you in front of this door again and again. Its you with the decision to make. Total surrender.

Step through it and you may not feel all that different. You'll probably be the same person you are now. But the purpose of your life will have changed. Stepping through the door doesn't change you - it does, however, change everything you're heading toward from this point on.

It means breaking the husk of my individual independence of God, and the emancipating of my personality into oneness with Himself, not for my own ideas, but for absolute loyalty to Jesus.

-Oswald Chambers.

I have hit the insomniac button again yet not much is being accomplished. As always, the fault lies in the same place. I wonder though, it is possible to not care? To not let the situation overwhelm or break you down.

ah well, study time. nerd mode:ON. Reproductive system seem to haunt even my dreams.

3 more days...

3 hari lagi...

awayfromeverything.

He is Lord, He is Lord

Sings my soul, He is Lord.

And he lives, yes he lives.

In weakness or trial or pain

This is my prayer in the desert
And all that's within me feels dry
This is my prayer in the hunger in me
My God is a God who provides

And this is my prayer in the fire
In weakness or trial or pain
There is a faith proved
Of more worth than gold
So refine me Lord through the flames

And I will bring praise
I will bring praise
No weapon forged against me shall remain

I will rejoice
I will declare
God is my victory and He is here

:)

She's exhausted she's tired she's scared.

And yet, the sun still shines in the morning! There is still air in her lungs. There is still reason to live. She wonders. 

herGodisaGodwhoprovides. 

Breathe in, breathe out. 3 weeks. only.3.weeks.more.

Here today and gone tomorrow

I can't do this on my own.

Realizing last night how much I still truly lack and knowing my own strength is insufficient... Makes it actually harder to believe in a God that's real, that's mighty to save. But then again, he's bigger than this.

There is just so much to learn.

His purposes will ripen fast,
Unfolding every hour;
The bad may have a bitter taste
But sweet will be the flower. —Cowper

You're the only one

Hit me like a ray of sun
Burning through my darkest night
You’re the only one that I want
Think I’m addicted to your light 

Lecithin / sphingomyelin ratio

Reid Index

Raynaud's Phenomenon

Microscopic Polyangiitis

Hypersensitive pneumonitis

These names are staring back at me now even as I attempt to waste more time not studying. I don't know if its the stress or the adrenaline rush.. but I'm not liking it very much.

i miss sleep :(

sleep.. where for art thou!

I've realized that pleasing people shouldn't be a chore. Wanting to make people happy should not be an obligation. And I'm learning from the best people around. Funny how God puts the right people in your life in the exact right season you need them.

Trust in the Lord, and do good; dwell in the land, and feed on His faithfulness. —Psalm 37:3 

I've been counting my blessings.. and realizing that he has indeed been faithful.. (its up to us anyway to see the cup as half full or half empty. blek.) for the funniest mum and dad with the biggest hearts. for a crazy brother (who i havent heard from in ages *sigh*sigh*SIGH*). for friends who make the world go round, friends with different skin tone. friends who look radianttt, friends who sshiinneee :P blek.

i think.. 

i'm in love.

and its a good place to be. :)

I swore I’d never fall again
But this don’t even feel like falling
Gravity can’t forget
So pull me back to the ground again

Reason enough

I don't know what You saw in me
But I'm glad You believed
In spite of my condition
That Your mission was to rescue my heart
Don't understand the sacrifice
Why You gave up Your life for
the sake of my soul
Only heaven knows

There's a mystery that lies
Within the logic of Your love
There's an undying mercy
That I'm unworthy of

New week. Lecturers. PBLs. Friends. People.

I need to get back on track. Somehow

break my heart now you know

i is here.

alone.

i can blame it on the mood swings.

but heck, why put the blame on the poor hormones? their doing their job, arent they?

so, i is here.

and i'm hurt.

dammit.

you should have known better.

and you have the audicity to do that?

guys, it hurts. what you did hurt!

*angry moment will pass by Natasha.. just BREATHE*

maybe coming home wasn't a good idea after all. Mugging seems so tempting now. anything is better than this.

so i'm here.

alone.

and so it goes, when she's pissed, when she's hurt.. she listens to...

she shalt not berjiwang again after this! 

oh well. lilly's waiting for her.

I've had the time of my life

yep. ive had the time of my life today

in the room.

by myself.

after cake.

after roti jala and sate.

after teh tarik.

after whiskey & vodka.

on deepavali.

trying to study.

BUT

how to study with people running and screaming around??

how to study with people just downstairs enjoying themselves. with food.. spoilt with choice!

yet she is better than that dammit

yes, she can overcome temptation and shall refrain from petty small talk

and wonderful glorious food.

u guys better come for deepavali next year.

or else.